OK, so Benny is our trial in life. He is just a very determined little boy. So yesterday we took family pictures at Target (which went great). On our way out to get some food and to Byron's football practice. Benny got mad because ....actually I don't even remember why he got mad. But he started his yelling and screaming at the top of his lungs. So I told Steve to keep walking and ignoring him and he would come. So as we got closer to the door, he would run up to get closer to us, but still a good 20 ft behind us. And would look to see if we were watching him. So I sent Steve out to the car with the other kids. I slowly walked towards the doors and then he went nuts. He threw himself to the ground kicking and screaming at the top of his lungs. By this point everyone was watching him and me. A couple eating were pointing and laughing at him, the cop was wondering if I was going to get him...and other people were giving me dirty looks (which could be interpreted as you are such a bad mom, control your kids). And all I wanted to say was "You're an inconsiderate, selfish person to judge me." Anyways after a minute of his kicking fit, I walked over to him, he flipped over to hide from me and beat the ground and continued to yell, and I tickled him. I calmly bent down and said, "Don't you feel a little silly doing all this." He stopped crying, and said "What?" I said "Don't you feel silly hitting the ground and screaming?" He stood up looked up me and said "I want you mommy." I told him to say Sorry and give me a hug. So he took a few seconds looked at me with his tear filled out and said "Sorry mommy, I love you." I picked him up and he gave me a huge hug and a kiss. And as I was walking out, the cop smiled at me, the couple said "What a good mom she is" and I walked out proud of myself for controlling my temper, and having enough patience to teach Benny a lesson instead of punishing him. And enough patience not to say something to those judgemental people.
Now I am not saying he won't do that again...because if you know Benny you know he has a temper(it started with his speech problems), but hopefully he learned that acting that way is silly. And hopefully it is a big step for me in controlling my anger, and learning patience. And next time I see a mom having the same problem, maybe I can lend a hand in helping her, instead of judging her.
6 comments:
That must of been so frustrating for you and you handled it wonderfully!! Having Steve take out the kids must of been a big help. I'm so proud of you. The situation could of been an ugly part of your day but it turned into a good experience for both of you.
Way to go! I need to remember that the next time one of my kids does that. Jessica definitely loses her temper much like that in public. I guess she does it at home too, but it seems more disruptive in public.
Mindi :)
benny and william sound like twins :) well, actually, he doesn't do tantrums to that extent in public but he sure has at home (ask jenni!). it's awful and all i can do is ignore him. if i try to do anything else, he just scratches me. so i ignore him most of the time.
That was Benny's first public display to that extreme, so I was glad I was able to remain calm...at home I just ignore him.
My Tyson always flips out in Target. Great example of keeping your cool. I'm so glad you shared; it gives me strength to know others go through the same things as me.
What a great story Adrienne! Thanks for sharing. Neat to see how you handled that. I don't know what I would have done
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